On behalf of the Lyle family I would like to thank all of you for your prayers, cards, flowers, contributions, food and every other manner of support and encouragement we have received during Jim’s illness and death. We have been overwhelmed with the outpouring of love and kindness and we are so grateful.
All of you know that Jim was an incredibly kind and generous person. I have always thought he had a gift for making everyone he met feel special. He took the time to learn a person’s name and some sort of obscure detail about their life and he never forgot it. He called everyone by name and if you were very lucky he called you by a nickname. He always looked for the good in people-almost to a fault (one of his partners said that over the years they had kept several employees in their office much longer than they should have because Jim said, “Just give them one more chance.”) He was quick to make newcomers feel welcome- I had several doctors tell me at the visitation that Jim had been so nice to them and made them feel welcome when they first came to Brookwood. Jim was truly the most optimistic and positive person I have ever met. He never complained, even through the most physically grueling side effects from the chemo. Throughout all of this, he stayed focused on the needs of those around him. When Jim was first diagnosed with lymphoma and was going to the hospital to have a biopsy, he wrote two notes and put them on Bevin and Reagan’s bathroom mirrors. It said, “Stay strong and be brave, everything will be all right. I love you. Daddy”
I was fortunate to have been able to take off from work from the day he was diagnosed to be with him during this past year. Some people from the outside looking in at our family might think that we were the unluckiest people on the planet with everything that happened. We always felt blessed. Very early in this process we turned the situation over to God and trusted in his plan for our lives and in His unfailing love. Jim and I got to spend probably more time together during the past year than the previous 24 years we had been married when we were so busy working and running kids around in different directions. I felt so fortunate to be able to be there to take care of him when he was feeling bad and then he in turn was there to help me through my surgery and chemo when I was diagnosed with breast cancer. God’s timing worked out just right that we were each strongest when the other was weakest – we always looked at each other and our bald heads and laughed that we made quite a pair. We have had so many wonderful moments over the past year and many conversations that we might not have otherwise had. When faced with these circumstances you learn to value the everyday, mundane moments as something very, very special. Jim loved his family more than anything. We were blessed that he was the kind of man who always told us and showed us how much he loved us everyday, even before he was diagnosed with his illness and how much more so over the past year. To say that we loved him and we miss him is such an understatement but I can’t find the words to express the depth of our emotion. Those of us who were blessed to have Jim in our lives will never be the same. But maybe we can learn from Jim and honor his memory by trying to be a little kinder to people, take the time to learn their names and something about them and remember it, enjoy the everyday moments, show the people you love how you feel, find something to laugh and smile about, even in the worst of circumstances, keep focused on the needs of others and thank God for his many blessings. I requested that Psalm 13 be read as the scripture for Jim’s funeral. I felt that it summed up the way that we had dealt with the events of the past year. In this Psalm David is crying out in despair from his circumstances but in the midst of all this he makes a choice, as we did, not to dwell on the circumstances: “But I trust in your unfailing love; my heart rejoices in your salvation. I will sing to the Lord, for he has been good to me.”
We are all doing well. Bevin is finishing her finals at Auburn now and going back for summer school. She is getting a new puppy today ( a border terrier) that she will be able to take back to school with her in the fall and she is getting her tonsils out later this week. Reagan is finishing up her freshman year at Vestavia Hills High School and staying busy with cheerleading and now driving herself everywhere. She was able to raise over $5,000 for the American Cancer Society through the Relay for Life event. The high school students raised more than $136,000. Thanks to all of you who contributed to this great event. I have finished my chemo and I’m physically feeling fine – I actually played golf with family this week and scored my all time best score (after having not played at all for the past two years). I plan to go back to work (part time) sometime soon.
We have all felt lifted up by your many prayers and have experienced the peace that can only come from God. We look forward to the day when we will see Jim again. In the meantime, we will continue in our efforts to “Stay strong and be brave” as Jim would want us to do.
Love and blessings to you all,
Shelia Lyle
